Television - at it's finest?!

Cheviot Quarry
Originally uploaded by Ms. Moll.

I image some of you who read my blog will have been surprised to find that I've been silent regarding the new BBC drama, 'Bonekickers', which started this week.

The main reason for this is that my television doesn't work and I hadn't got round to watching it online - but I have now.

And I find my self almost lost for words at the awfulness of the whole thing! But I'll try!

Firstly I have to say that I DID enjoy it, in a cringing sort of way - I just 'used my archaeological imagination', it was a total load of hookum but it did have some fantastic lines (in between the stupid storyline, bad acting and even worse archaeological practice - Professor Mark Horton should be in hiding).

I think I have to put a few things straight for my non-archaeological friends and family.

1) Archaeology is not that fun, even if we like to think it is (and secretly wish it was).

2) A medieval coin doesn't just 'pop' out of the grass without the builders even digging any holes.

3) A site such as that would at least have had a desktop survey and probably trial trenching before the builders got anywhere near.

4) Archaeologists don't wear dinner jackets - unless they are trying to get funding out of someone!

5) C14 and Dendro dates take months to get - NOT minutes!

6) Anyone who 'yanked' a find out of the ground like that would NEVER be allowed on another site (and then she appeared to just walk off site with it?!)

7) IF wood survived like that it would have to be preserved (eg. kept wet) to stop it beginning to decay as soon as it was taken out of the ground.

8) No archaeologist could afford to live in a flat on the Royal Crescent in Bath

9) Even if someone bought the site they wouldn't be able to stop an archaeological dig - the government (eg. English Heritage) and various other people (eg. the County Archaeologist) wouldn't allow that
10) hard hats??? Health and safety would have a field day.

10) as if someone wouldn't have found a big cavern full of crosses before then?!

And loads of other things I've probably missed as I was laughing so much!!

The only saving grace of the programme was the fantastic lines and quotes -

Do you know what history is, mate? It's layers.

Hacked to death, they were all hacked to death.

This is rewriting the books stuff.

Use your archaeological imagination.

Everything packed in acid free paper.

I'm just a grubby wee digger.

Antiquity with titties and front bottoms.

Let's do dendrochronology!

and my fav -

Remove your stringy buttocks from my dig.

Makes me wish I was a digging archaeologist again so that I could say that to someone!